Monday, October 03, 2005

The cast of full house... Where are they now?

Well we all know that the Olsen twins are the worlds richest 18 year old anorexic coke heads (who knew that the straight to video market was so lucrative) but what happened to the rest of the cast from full house.


John ( 1-800-C-A-L-L-A-T-T) Stamos - Jesse Katsopolis
When Stamos finally figured out that being in a 90's version of the Beach boys really wasn't that cool his acting career had gone the way of Brian Wilson's music career. Stamos needed a plan (actually he needed a meal ticket) so he married Rebecca Romijn. Eventually Rebecca got sick of working while Stamos sat on the couch watching Saved by the Bell re-runs so she divorced him.

last seen:Drawing up papers to try and take half or Rebecca's money.

most likely to: Put out a classified ad asking if anyone needs a bongo drum player.


Bob (the poor mans Jeff Goldblum) Saget - Danny Tanner
Since the show Saget has done little more than make a cameo in "Half Baked" in which he played a true to life character. He reportedly did months and months of first hand research to properly get into the role. One important thing to note Saget did win the coveted "Worst Comedian alive" award since full house (I am 100% serious about that).

last seen:Writing threatening letters to Tom Bergeran (the current host of Americas Funniest Home Videos).

most likely to:Try and beat up Tom Bergeran. (when Saget appears on Hollywood Squares).


Dave (I swear I dated Alanis Morrisette) Coulier - Joey Gladstone
Coulier thought a little stint on the Surreal life would revive his career but upon realizing that the only part of him that could make any money was his kidney Dave "cut it out" and sold it on the black market.

last seen:Hanging out on the streets with a sign that says "Will impersonate Bullwinkle for food". Needless to say he's hungry.

most likely to:Be caught in bed with a Jakelope.


Lori (I was hot once wasn't I?) Loughlin - Rebecca "Becky" Katsopolis - Donaldson
Lori's Character Rebecca may be best remembered as Jesse's bitch wife who destroyed his chances of
being a rock star in Japan (at least that's all I remember of her)

last seen:On a soon to be canceled TV series.

most likely to:Appear in a made for TV movie, leaving the audience saying "hey she kinda looks familiar, ahh who cares change the channel".


After doing some research it seems that the girls from full house have (for the most part) left the world of entertainment to follow "regular" lives. It doesn't seem right to make fun of them seeing as it was humiliation enough to have been on full house for all those years.


Candace (Keep your stick on the ice) Cameron - DJ Tanner
As you may have heard Candace married a hockey player and had a couple kids, what you may not know is that she is a hardcore religious freak.

last seen:Converting the non-believers.

most likely to:Convince her brother Kirk to check into rehab.


Jodie (I was the annoying one) Sweetin - Stephanie Tanner
Jodie is also married now and rumor has it she wants to start directing.

last seen:Answering questions about the Olsen twins.

most likely to:Never be seen again.



Andrea Barber - Kimmy Gibbler
Andrea went to school to study psychology. Considering the people she was surrounded by in her formative years it should come as no surprise.

last seen:Writing her thesis on the topic "The devastating effects of Saget and Couliers jokes on a child's brain"

most likely to:Make a future appearance with Screech and Erkel in a show entitled "The worst sitcom characters of all time".

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29 comments:

  1. Apparently, Dave Coulier is going to be on some new reality television show about ice skating competitions. I am dead serious.

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  2. Wow! I'd say that's quite the scoop! Good job!
    Peace...............

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  3. hehehehehe I can totally see her as a religious freak. It makes too much sense. Thanks for the giggles :)

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  4. Bob Saget was phenomenal in "The Aristocrats", telling the dirtiest version of the dirtiest joke in the world. An absolute must-see.

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  5. Anonymous10:17 PM

    your articles SUCKED! i hated it , because i love full house and all though the olsen twin part is true i think your making it all up!!!I did my own research to find out that your stuff is a BIG FAT LIE!!!

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  6. Anonymous12:34 PM

    The last 2 comments are obviously posted by people who have no idea what satire is

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  7. Anonymous12:35 PM

    you guys rock i love all the full house actors i love you guys

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  8. Anonymous4:33 PM

    yo guys i love you guys im on a web site called {google .com} and im lookin at pictures of u guys.. i love u guys. jeses little bitch is pretty and so is mary- kate and stepanie and D.J ur all pretty. all the girls are pretty

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  9. Anonymous12:49 PM

    i can not belive what this website say...it it completly embarassing and totally wronge. this is not right. if anyone belives this u are the stupidest people on earth. even tho some of this infomation is correct...it is still not right to post on the internet.

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  10. Anonymous9:07 PM

    yeah..no offence but you guys are frigan retards..what?..are the olsen twins good friends of yours..and you know everything about them..haha thats funny..you dont..so dont make assumptions about people like that when you have absolutely no idea what they are actually like.

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  11. Anonymous4:30 AM

    i am literally LOL'ing.
    thank you, sir.

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  12. Anonymous6:15 PM

    This is like seriously the most retarded site. Full House is so cool and I know they all didnt turn out to be losers. Why does everything have to be bad about them? This is the worst site....

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  13. Anonymous7:07 PM

    This is awful! Who could write such a thing?? Anyways, Officer Riley is checking in on this site and reporting it. Whoever wrote it, you are in trouble. Oh yeah, I hope you have a awesome life in the slammer, and hell.

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  14. Anonymous9:50 PM

    Where is michelle

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  15. Anonymous8:31 AM

    All of u people who hate full house are straight up player haters. You try going up there and try to perform in front of the whole world!To me I think they are really funny and i wish 4 the best 4 them because thay have done a very good jod and Dave Coulier is not a Hobo and Jhon Stamos is not a bitch all u that hate full house are bithes and jack asses what do u have to say about that!

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  16. Anonymous9:53 AM

    To those people that are big fans of full house I think that this show great dont you think? I just finished looking up Jodie Sweetin and she looks fantasstic not that im a lasbian or anything i am just saying that she looks very preety and if you want to see pictures of her go to google search and type in Jodie Sweetin. Havent you noticed that very preety girl actresses always get married to very ugly? For Example: Candace Cameron married to this hocky player and he is ugly although i want to take a look at Candaces children. I also wantbut we couldnt to know how do u get into a T.V show? I was going to be in this cereal commercial but i couldnt because you had to take calsses and well they cost to much. The place that I went to see o that commercial was where Twitty that kid who in even stevens Luises friend yeah him he went there and i guess thats how hes in T.V now. I also really want to meet all the cast members of FullHouse they look so interesting I still dont get why does anybody in the world want to have anorexia for those of ou who dont know what anorexia is anoerxia is somehting where you think you are to fat but actually you are very very skinny like Mary-Kate Olsen has. That is really stupid. Again all of you hate full house are player haters BITCHES!Also if u dont know the names of the cast of Full house there are Candace Cameron, Dave Coulier, Jhon Stamos, Bob Sagdet, Mary-Kate and Ashley Olsen, Jodie Sweetin, Lori Loughin, Scott Weighin i think thats his name im not sure well thats all i can think of right now Big fans Big fans!

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  17. Anonymous9:55 AM

    I LOVE YOU JODI SWEETIN!

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  18. Anonymous10:05 AM

    Now this is a story all about how my life got flipped turned up side down and ide like to take a minuete and sit right there and ill tell you how i became the prince of a town called Belaire

    In west Philladelphia born and raised on the playground is where i spent most of my days chillin out maxin relaxin all cool and all shooting some b-ball out side of the school when a couple of guys said were up to no good started making trouble in my neighborhood i got in one little fight and my mom got scared she said youre moving with youre auntie and youre uncle in Belaire

    I whistled for a cab and when it came near the license plate said fresh and had dice in the mirror if anything i could say that ths cab was rare but i thought naw forget yo home to Belaire

    I pulled up to a house about 7 or 8 and i yelled to the cabby yo home smell you later looked at my kingdom i was finally there to settle my throne as the pirnce of belaire

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  19. Anonymous10:06 AM

    I wrote that song tht came straight from the show
    i just felt like writing it

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  20. Anonymous11:45 AM

    all wat u said was wrong no one knows about them so get a life!

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  21. Anonymous1:39 PM

    I also agree with the person who wrote that who ever hate the full house cast members and full house then they are player haters and that that person thinks that she looks fantastic and whoever the fuck is kakaw then you are really stupid thats why youre still stuck in the first grade

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  22. Anonymous1:44 PM

    O my god i just saw Jhon Stamos! Out in my nieghborhood if you want to see him come to 1563 S.W 115 Ave! Quivk hes leaving!

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  23. Anonymous9:40 PM

    im watching full hous riht now im only in 1rst grade im 5 years old well bye

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  24. Anonymous7:55 AM

    yes, this stuff is pretty much true. especially about the religious nut

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  25. Anonymous1:23 PM

    i think jhon stammpos rocks!!!!!!!!!

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  26. Anonymous5:50 PM

    hey whats wehith diching full house i love full house. all that crap isnt true i even lookeds it for my self so if you dont like full house DON'T WATCH IT!!! (man i sould become a theripist)

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  27. Anonymous1:04 AM

    Oh my god.
    Dont bagg out the full house people.
    You just dont have a proper life of your own to do anything else!
    That stuff isnt true.
    I grew up watching that show and I know for a fact that heap of lies and crap isnt true.
    So GO GET A LIFE!

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  28. Anonymous4:31 AM

    oh dear , thought this was a real post !

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  29. Anonymous12:45 PM

    that is the most dummest thing i ever read

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